Today I got on the scale again.
I braced myself to see 242. Again. Still. Hopefully, even (you know...anywhere but up!) But you know what?
I'm back to 240! So, that's a 4 pound weight loss this week!
I know for us (women, that is...), we can fluctuate in a 5-10 pound range without it being "true" weight lost...but I'm holding onto this one. I have to, or I might go crazy. I'm just so relieved to find the scale beginning to move!
I ditched the shakes this last week, in favor of a turkey wrap with some crunchy romaine lettuce (I've been absolutely craving that lettuce...there's just nothing better than a wrap with nice crunchy lettuce) for lunch, but that's really the only change I've made. Still eating every couple hours.
As far as exercise, I spoke a little too soon about my 30-day shred plans the other day. My hubby was out of town since Monday night, and I don't sleep very well at all when he's gone (seriously, very few hours of sleep), so I needed that extra hour in between charge #1 and charge #2 so that I could finally sleep a little and actually function to care for 3 kids all day.
So, since he'll be home tonight (yay!), I'll actually get some good rest the next couple nights and will begin the program Friday morning. I'm excited to try it, and hopeful that the pounds will continue to come off.
Thanks to all of you who read this. I know it's not the most exciting journey in the world, but I'm trying to rewrite my future, and I'm grateful to all of you coming along with me and for your encouragment and support!
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
Still trying...
So here we are, a little over 3 weeks into this, and I have managed to lose 2 pounds. Those two pounds came off of the 4 that I put on when I fell off the wagon. So, I'm still 2 pounds more than when I started. 242.
It's more than frustrating to be here. I think I've made some really positive changes in the last few weeks and have managed to pick myself back up a couple times instead of staying down, as I would have in times past.
And...there has been an injury that kept me from working out for almost two weeks. But I'm all healed now, and I know from prior experience that I HAVE to work out to lose significant weight. I can't just cut some calories and see any real progress. That's just the way my body does it. I just got my 30-day shred DVD, and will begin tomorrow.
I'm saying an extra prayer that I can avoid injury!
For now, my goal is to stick with it for 30 days (I have to think small, otherwise I get too overwhelmed with the big picture). So, from October 19th until November 17th.
This means I give up my extra hour of sleep after one of my little charges arrives at 6:00am (and goes back to sleep around 6:15). But that's ok. I bet I'll feel more energized for the kiddos, which can never hurt. :)
Wish me luck!
Wish me luck!
It's more than frustrating to be here. I think I've made some really positive changes in the last few weeks and have managed to pick myself back up a couple times instead of staying down, as I would have in times past.
And...there has been an injury that kept me from working out for almost two weeks. But I'm all healed now, and I know from prior experience that I HAVE to work out to lose significant weight. I can't just cut some calories and see any real progress. That's just the way my body does it. I just got my 30-day shred DVD, and will begin tomorrow.
I'm saying an extra prayer that I can avoid injury!
For now, my goal is to stick with it for 30 days (I have to think small, otherwise I get too overwhelmed with the big picture). So, from October 19th until November 17th.
This means I give up my extra hour of sleep after one of my little charges arrives at 6:00am (and goes back to sleep around 6:15). But that's ok. I bet I'll feel more energized for the kiddos, which can never hurt. :)
Wish me luck!
Wish me luck!
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
reconditioning
I was watching a story on extreme eating on the Today show early this morning, and there was a woman who had the lap-band procedure done. But she was talking about how even though she had this thing done, it didn't change anything about the way she thought about food, or the need to continue the emotional eating. And so she was eating "slider foods" (in other words, foods that would "slide" past the lap band). She lost 150 lbs and then gained it back plus some.
It struck me kind of hard, because I struggle with those emotional issues with food, and she's right, no quick fix - or even a good diet plan - teaches you how to disconnect the food from the emotions.
I realize I have to rethink my process. Because if the last week has shown me anything, it's that eating less is not the only remedy I need. I need to recondition my brain to think of food as nourishment and fuel, instead of as consolation, comfort, a means of celebration, or even as a "friend" when I'm all by myself. This has been going on for such a long time that it's not truly something that even makes it to the forefront of my brain when I eat.
That's the thing about habits...after a while you stop noticing that you're even doing it. I think the same applies to the many, many, many times I've quit my weight-loss efforts. My brain is so conditioned into the "Try ---> Small Success ---> Obstacle ---> Quit" cycle that I don't even make a conscious decision to quit. It just kind of happens.
And it's particularly hard to be in a battle of wits with your very own brain. It's like playing chess with a computer. You might win 1 time out of 1,000, and usually by accident.
I don't know why I can see other people's successes and still not see this endeavor as possible for me. And that might be my biggest stumbling block.
So let's start small.
#1: I believe I can lose weight. I have proof of this possibility...I lost 25 pounds my junior year of college through hard work and watching what I ate. And I worked my tail off. It doesn't matter where that determination went or why I don't have it in this moment. I know I am capable of it. I will stop pitying myself, because I am just as capable and just as worthy of success as anyone else who has made this same journey.
#2: Pay attention to what I'm eating. Put a note on the pantry door and refrigerator that says: "What are you consuming? What's in it and how will it benefit you?"
This is what I'll do this week. Baby steps, stop thinking so big that I get overwhelmed, and battle my own brain. It doesn't seem like much, but have you ever played chess against the computer? It's hard, ya'll.
It struck me kind of hard, because I struggle with those emotional issues with food, and she's right, no quick fix - or even a good diet plan - teaches you how to disconnect the food from the emotions.
I realize I have to rethink my process. Because if the last week has shown me anything, it's that eating less is not the only remedy I need. I need to recondition my brain to think of food as nourishment and fuel, instead of as consolation, comfort, a means of celebration, or even as a "friend" when I'm all by myself. This has been going on for such a long time that it's not truly something that even makes it to the forefront of my brain when I eat.
That's the thing about habits...after a while you stop noticing that you're even doing it. I think the same applies to the many, many, many times I've quit my weight-loss efforts. My brain is so conditioned into the "Try ---> Small Success ---> Obstacle ---> Quit" cycle that I don't even make a conscious decision to quit. It just kind of happens.
And it's particularly hard to be in a battle of wits with your very own brain. It's like playing chess with a computer. You might win 1 time out of 1,000, and usually by accident.
I don't know why I can see other people's successes and still not see this endeavor as possible for me. And that might be my biggest stumbling block.
So let's start small.
#1: I believe I can lose weight. I have proof of this possibility...I lost 25 pounds my junior year of college through hard work and watching what I ate. And I worked my tail off. It doesn't matter where that determination went or why I don't have it in this moment. I know I am capable of it. I will stop pitying myself, because I am just as capable and just as worthy of success as anyone else who has made this same journey.
#2: Pay attention to what I'm eating. Put a note on the pantry door and refrigerator that says: "What are you consuming? What's in it and how will it benefit you?"
This is what I'll do this week. Baby steps, stop thinking so big that I get overwhelmed, and battle my own brain. It doesn't seem like much, but have you ever played chess against the computer? It's hard, ya'll.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Wrenches
So it hasn't been pretty since I hurt my knee. I've used it as an excuse to give up.
Yes, even after my personal victory two weeks ago, I left it all behind and fell off that proverbial wagon. I haven't stepped on the scale, because I don't want to know what it will say.
Any other time in my life that I've tried to do this, once I fell off the wagon, I stayed off. But I wrote this blog to keep myself accountable. And I don't think I could look any of you in the eye again if I don't finish this thing.
So. I fell off. And now I'm getting back up. If you look to the left on my family blog, you'll see a link to a blog I read called Adios, Fat Pants (and I will get the links to my fave blogs on here soon, too). And this morning I read this entry:
http://adiosfatpants.blogspot.com/2010/10/oven-disaster-and-learning-lessons.html
She talks about the wrenches that get thrown into our efforts sometimes, and how it's no excuse to stop doing what you're doing. And reading it I realized that I always give up when it happens. Case in point: my knee, among about a million other things in years past. But at some point I have to decide that I won't anymore...that there will be a last time that I'll let those wrenches affect me and my goals. And this is it.
And for the record, my knee? Has been 100% for about 4 days now. Yay!
Yes, even after my personal victory two weeks ago, I left it all behind and fell off that proverbial wagon. I haven't stepped on the scale, because I don't want to know what it will say.
Any other time in my life that I've tried to do this, once I fell off the wagon, I stayed off. But I wrote this blog to keep myself accountable. And I don't think I could look any of you in the eye again if I don't finish this thing.
So. I fell off. And now I'm getting back up. If you look to the left on my family blog, you'll see a link to a blog I read called Adios, Fat Pants (and I will get the links to my fave blogs on here soon, too). And this morning I read this entry:
http://adiosfatpants.blogspot.com/2010/10/oven-disaster-and-learning-lessons.html
She talks about the wrenches that get thrown into our efforts sometimes, and how it's no excuse to stop doing what you're doing. And reading it I realized that I always give up when it happens. Case in point: my knee, among about a million other things in years past. But at some point I have to decide that I won't anymore...that there will be a last time that I'll let those wrenches affect me and my goals. And this is it.
And for the record, my knee? Has been 100% for about 4 days now. Yay!
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
better
Sorry it's been a few days! They have been intensely busy days at that! I've been thoroughly worn out at the end of the week since I started caring for a four-month-old last week, and this week started with another 14 month-old. They keep me on my toes!
I think my knee is healing. There were about 4 days there that I had to take motrin all day to keep from being in tons of pain. But the last couple days have been fine. I still take a dose at night as I'm going to bed because it keeps it from hurting when I wake up, but during the day I'm just icing it periodically, and it's been about 75% better. Still a little sore by day's end, but overall much improved. I feel reassured that it IS healing and that it won't be too long before I can resume some calorie-busting moves.
I'm going to stay away from the running for a couple months. It's disappointing, but I think it's something I need to try again after I've lost some weight. I'm hopeful it'll go more smoothly then.
I'm just waiting for my 30 Day Shred to arrive and give it a try. I'm also looking into Weight Watchers. I hate to think I can't figure out how to eat on my own, but with three kids going, going, going all day I tend to just grab what's there. I've taken most things out of my pantry that would be bad for me anyway, but I feel like I would benefit from the guidance, at least for a little while.
I've definitely been struggling with some willpower issues the last few days...when I'm working out it seems easier to eat better and resist temptation!
Hope you are all enjoying the fall weather!
I think my knee is healing. There were about 4 days there that I had to take motrin all day to keep from being in tons of pain. But the last couple days have been fine. I still take a dose at night as I'm going to bed because it keeps it from hurting when I wake up, but during the day I'm just icing it periodically, and it's been about 75% better. Still a little sore by day's end, but overall much improved. I feel reassured that it IS healing and that it won't be too long before I can resume some calorie-busting moves.
I'm going to stay away from the running for a couple months. It's disappointing, but I think it's something I need to try again after I've lost some weight. I'm hopeful it'll go more smoothly then.
I'm just waiting for my 30 Day Shred to arrive and give it a try. I'm also looking into Weight Watchers. I hate to think I can't figure out how to eat on my own, but with three kids going, going, going all day I tend to just grab what's there. I've taken most things out of my pantry that would be bad for me anyway, but I feel like I would benefit from the guidance, at least for a little while.
I've definitely been struggling with some willpower issues the last few days...when I'm working out it seems easier to eat better and resist temptation!
Hope you are all enjoying the fall weather!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)